Hands off my Prada.

There was a girl in her twenties smiling at my little brother. They were standing next to each other in line for crappy mall chinese food. I, in the middle of my chik-fil-a-and-DQ-blizzards diet, walked up behind him and told him I was going to grab a table. The girl looked up at me like I just knocked her designer purse out of her hands.

My brother came and sat down. 'She was nice. She works at JC Penneys. She asked me where I go to school. She said toodles.' I was horrified. The girl looked older than me. Surely, she must know that it's TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE to smile at my brother. And. TOODLES? Who the fuck does she think she's kidding? I've a good mind to go to Penneys tomorrow and hunt that statutory-starved-crazygirl down.