I think I would make an awesome dictator.

In the words of the great Angela Carter:

'The axe falls. The flesh severs. The head rolls.'

I had to fire my first employee yesterday. I sat down and looked at her and went blank. My legs were shaking. I don't like to rehearse what I'm going to say before I discipline people. I like to think on my feet and just yell out everything that rises to the surface. One motion - right off, like a band-aid. It's worked pretty well for me thus far. For the first ten seconds or so, all I could manage were quiet, drawn-out 'Weeellllll's. She knew it was coming. She wasn't surprised and she didn't cry, which I will always be infinitely thankful for.

I gave my speech, my reasoning, my apologies. I finished. She stood up to go. Awestruck, I said something like, 'You don't have to go out right away... If you need a minute, you can sit back here for a while'. I'm not sure, but I think she laughed at me. She left the room first.

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Why do those moonie-moms in the Ovaltine commercial call it Ovaltine Hot and not Hot Ovaltine?